There’s a temptation in divorce discussions to score points or lay down a marker that things weren’t your fault. It’s understandable but in most cases unhelpful

Tempting as it may be to go for an adversarial approach to divorce – whether in negotiating style or through litigation – the approach can make the process slower, more expensive and more damaging.

In contrast, a more collaborative and low-conflict approach, where ex- partners endeavour to act as ‘we’ rather than ‘I’, will usually lead to better outcomes for everyone, including children and wider family.

“Collaboration can help to detox the divorce process.”

  1. Having four-way sessions with collaboratively-trained lawyers offers a blend of structure and that cater for your own situation flexibility to craft arrangements – something that the narrower range of options available in a Sheriff Court are unlikely to do.
  2. Collaboration can help to detox the divorce process – this is really important when children are involved. The four-way process sets a more considered tone that will ideally extend beyond meetings – so children are less likely to witness emotional mayhem or family members pitted against each other.
  3. Future arrangements - for example, about childcare – designed through constructive and mutual agreement with your ex-partner are far more likely to stick than those imposed by a court order or through people playing hard ball.

Low-Conflict Divorce

There are various low-conflict options to choose from in divorce, using alternative dispute resolution approaches such as mediation.

An increasingly popular and well- regarded approach is collaborative divorce, where clients and their solicitors take part in ‘four-way’ settlement meetings, with a commitment to avoid resorting to litigation, even if discussions turn difficult. Other specialists, such as a financial adviser or counsellor, can also join meetings if all agree that some specialist guidance would aid progress.

If you’re interested in choosing this approach to divorce, look for a solicitor qualified in Collaborative Law.